DAZE

     There are times in life when so much is going on that I find it hard to really enjoy each minute.  Times when I am running from one event to another, from one meeting to another, from one moment to another... and when I lie down at the end of the day already thinking about the deadlines, preparations, events, finals, and work that the next day holds.  All this spinning puts me into a daze.  

   I am thankful for the times when I hear that still small voice calling, when creation itself halts me in my tracks and reminds me just how small I am and how completely connected I am to everything else.  Those are the times when I can step outside of myself and embrace the present for what it is... A glorious opportunity to enjoy life.   To actually live the life within and around me.  Yes those deadlines are still there, my finals will still happen next week, but they'll also be over after that.  The semester is closing and there are a million things to be done, but they will also be done soon enough.  If I don't slow down enough to live through it, all of it will simply pass me by.   It will be time spent not time enlivened.  

   I find it curious that we even speak of time in this way.  Always in the terminology of currency.   Time is spent, saved, passed, lost, used, invested...   Those are all things we do with money.  I want to start enlivening my time... to view it as a chance to live and be lived in.  The ancient Greeks had a separate word for time like this... Kairos.  It's a word for time meaning a moment or an event- this is opposed to Chronos or chronological time (I always wondered how we go that term!).  A Greek statue named Kairos shows a man with winged feet who has long bangs and is bald on the back of his head.  The Greeks say this is a lesson in appreciating time, opportunities must be grabbed onto (bangs) as they come, for when they pass there is nothing to grab onto (bald).  

   Don't let your life pass you by, it's the only one you have.  Enjoy every moment.

Weren't that we had died in Egypt

These are the words of the Israelites as they wandered through the wilderness and came up on the promise land.  They wouldn't return for many decades to come because their lack of trust in God's faithfulness and provisions.  The book of Numbers even reports them as saying, "Would that we had died in the land of Egypt!  Or would that we had died in this wilderness!  Why is the Lord bringing us into this land, to fall by the sword? Our wives and our little ones will be become plunder; would it not be better for us to return to Egypt?"

It isn't with judgement that I read over the actions of the Israelites, it is with sadness and empathy.  The saying hindsight is 20:20 is made overwhelmingly poignant in situations such as this.  Knowing that God would give the promise land over to the Israelites despite the seemingly overwhelming odds makes it easy for us to think poorly of them for not trusting in God.  But how often is this very theme displayed in our own life?  

God always keeps his promises, not matter what, and fortunately for us he doesn't always punish because he leaves room for repentance and grace.  God is a good father, his mercy and grace strike me to the core and fill me with awe in a way that nothing else in the world ever has, and like nothing I can imagine ever will.